If you’re on Twitter, I recommend following username @Emergency_Teds. They keep the United Kingdom safe, and some of us already know from experience that stuffed animals protect us at home.
While we’re on the topic: Please refrain from putting currency in the clotheswasher/dryer. Check all pockets carefully before washing. Some of us really can’t tolerate the sound of a coin spinning in the dryer. It’s as bad as fingernails on a blackboard.